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Parenting

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Parents and caregivers, you are not alone, others have walked and paved this path before you. Need support, lived experiences, faith-filled encouragement, and time to process head, heart, and soul? Welcome to your space.

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Parenting invites us to be curious, open, and discerning.

There's much hope - a way forward - one step and breath at a time. While some voices suggest that loving our rainbow child means we  ‘encourage’ them to be straight, you won’t find that rhetoric here.

There are many other voices worth listening to, offering faithful and life-giving outcomes for your child, your faith, and yourself.

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Keep the narrative going.

Many willingly share their mistakes having found themselves stuck between the proverbial rock and a hard place of “my child or the church”. Their stories tell of heartbreak and celebration, unlearning and relearning, loving well and letting go, and discovering God again for the first time.

God is in our biology.
So, let's talk about sex-
X,Y, GENE, SRY, cells, and receptors.

1
Friendly neighbourhood biologist here, @RebeccaRHelm.
I see a lot of people talking about biological sexes and gender right now.
Lots of folks make biological sex sex seem really simple.
Well, since it's so simple, let's find the biological roots, shall we?

Let's talk about sex... If you know a bit about biology you will probably say that biological sex is caused by chromosomes, XX and you're female, XY and you're male.
This is "chromosomal sex" but is it "biological sex"? Well...
2
Turns out there is only ONE GENE on the Y chromosome that really matters to sex.
It’s called the SRY gene. During human embryonic development, the SRY protein turns on male-associated genes. Having an SRY gene makes you “genetically male”.
But is that “biological sex”?

Sometimes that SRY gene pops off the Y chromosome and over to an X chromosome. Surprise!
So now you’ve got an X with a SRY and a Y without an SRY. What does this mean?
3
A Y with no SRY means physically you’re female, chromosomally you’re male (XY) and genetically you’re female (no SRY). An X with an SRY means you’re physically male, chromosomally female (XX) and genetically male (SRY). But biological sex is simple! There must be another answer…

Sex-related genes ultimately turn on hormones in specific areas on the body, and reception of those hormones by cells throughout the body. Is this the root of “biological sex”??
4
“Hormonal male” means you produce ‘normal’ levels of male-associated hormones.
Except some percentage of females will have higher levels of ‘male’ hormones than some percentage of males. Ditto ‘female’ hormones. And…

…if you’re developing, your body may not produce enough hormones for your genetic sex.
Leading you to be genetically male or female, hormonally non-binary, and physically non-binary. Well, except cells have something to say about this…
5
Maybe cells are the answer to “biological sex”?? Right??
Cells have receptors that “hear” the signal from sex hormones.
But sometimes those receptors don’t work.
Like a mobile-phone that’s on “do not disturb”. Call and cell, they will not answer.
6
What does this all mean?
It means you may be genetically male or female, chromosomally male or female, hormonally male/female/non-binary, with cells that may or may not hear the male/female/non-binary call, and all this leading to a body that can be male/non-binary/female.
Try out some combinations for yourself. Notice how confusing it gets?
7
Can you point to what the absolute cause of biological sex is?
Is it fair to judge people by it? Of course, you could try appealing to the numbers. “Most people are either male or female” you say. Except that as a biological professor I will tell you…

…that the reason I don’t have my students look at their own chromosome in class is because people could learn that their chromosomal sex doesn’t match their physical sex and learning that in the middle of a 10-point assignment is JUST NOT THE TIME
8
Biological sex is complicated.
Before you discriminate against someone on the basis of “biological sex” & identity, ask yourself: Have you seen YOUR chromosomes? Do you know the genes of the people you love?
The hormones of the people you work with? The state of their cells?
Since the answer will obviously be no, please be kind, respect people’s right to tell you who they are, and remember that you don’t have all the answers.

Again: biology is complicated. Kindness and respect don’t have to be.
@RebeccaRHelm

“When the light goes on for a parent and all the sudden they get it, that their job is not to convict but to love, we routinely get to see the parent and the child grow in a deeper relationship with God and with each other.”

Greg and Lynn McDonald

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Listen, Learn, Love.

Got some time to listen rather than read?
Listening to other perspectives that may not have yet been considered,
equally challenges the congruency and bias of our belief systems.
There's a quickening in the mind, body, heart, and especially soul when
Holy truth bombs drop into our organised and comfortable theology.
Welcome that quickening. Embrace those Holy ‘aha’ moments.

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Stories Matter

Stories and experiences through the eyes of others matter. Inside and outside of scripture and history lived stories continue to provide information, discomfort, curiosity, and transformation.  

A Blessing for you

Put your feet on the ground,
breathe deeply; in - out - repeat...

Gillian Curtis
1/5
May God remind you
of the happiness
your child bought you
from their first smiles,
frequently
May you hear
God's voice
reminding you
how much
Jesus
loves
YOUR
child
2/5
Gillian Curtis
May you know
God's love
more deeply
3/5
Gillian Curtis
May you experience
God's
daily
peace
4/5
Gillian Curtis
May you be
content
in the joy
of knowing
God
fully.
5/5
Gillian Curtis
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